Chinese Culture

Ten Ways To Have A Chinese Wedding

If you want to have a traditional Chinese wedding, few man knows how to do it right. Check out the top ten ways to celebrate your nuptials in classic Chinese style.

1. Red, Not White
In nearly all East Asian countries, but especially China, red is the color of happiness, especially for weddings. White, by contrast, is for funerals! A Chinese wedding must include red, and ceremonial objects such as candles and attire must exclude white. Red ink on white paper is considered a death threat, so invitations or menus with this combination are considered taboo. White roses may be acceptable in the bridal bouquet, as long as they are held together with colored ribbons. Any other white flowers suggest death and are used in funerals, so if you want white flowers, roses are your safest bet - perhaps the "fire and ice" variety. Most lilies will also work, as long as you avoid solid white.

2. Wear Traditional Attire
Chinese traditional attire is more varied than you think. China has more than 150 different cultures and ethnic groups that have lived together with little conflict for nearly 20,000 years. White Jade Design specializes in creating Chinese traditional clothing including dominant styles Qi Pau (Chinese Jacket) and Cheongsam. The Qi Pau is the traditional style of the two-dynasty Manchu people. While the Qi Pau is millennia old, Hong Kong's Cheongsam was developed during the 1920s under British colonial rule. Cheongsams are easily recognized; they are very slim and usually have two side slits for walking. For men, the style is called a Da Gua, featuring front-closing tunics that are either hip or knee length. For weddings, they are typically made of fabric similar to the bride's.

3. Chinese Brocades
Creator of the brocade (the method of weaving a pattern into a fabric instead of printing or embroidering it in), most Chinese don all-silk wedding brocades. The bride and groom wear brocades featuring the dragon, phoenix, or a mix of the two - the rest of the bridal party wears solid red or a brocade of another color. Formerly hard to find, Chinese brocades have become extremely popular, and most major fabric chains will carry at least one or two - cities with large Chinese populations having the most options.

4. Altar to the Ancestors
Respecting elders and remembering departed ancestors is a very important part of Chinese traditions. Set aside a table or altar decorated with white flowers for the ancestors. Fruits, a glass of offertory wine, and burning incense are also usually included. A beautiful Chinese alternative to a unity candle is to join two altars during the ceremony. Have two small altars on which the couple can kneel, and after the vows, join the two altars together to represent the new union. Have the immediate family members kneel with the bride and groom at the joined altar as a symbol of unity and joining families. Beautifully inclusive, remember that for Chinese, marriage is more about the families joined than the couple themselves.

5. Tea Ceremony
This ritual is followed in China, Korea, and Japan. Simpler than its Korean and Japanese counterparts, the Chinese tea ceremony is performed in a private anteroom following the ceremony, just before the reception. The couple serves tea to their parents and grandparents from a traditional porcelain set, often with dragons, flowers, or double happiness design. Serving her parents (mother first) followed by her grandparents, the tea is served in the same way to the groom's elders. The type of tea served is at the discretion of personal taste, though black dragon, orange blossom, and classic green tea are the preferred choices.

6. Double Happiness/Shuang Xi
Few can miss this very special wedding character which Chinese put on everything. The character is gold on a red background and you can find cutouts, scarves, and just about anything you want to decorate your wedding with this important symbol. Called double happiness because it is two xi (joy) characters put side by side and compressed into a single character, it is symbolic of the bride and groom's union. Manhattan, Chicago, San Franscisco, and other major Chinatowns have these in abundance, and stores in these areas are widening their commerce to the internet as well.

7. Dragons and the Phoenix
Heard the phrase "queen for a day?" Chinese practically invented the idea of bride and groom being empress and emperor for the day. Rooted in mythology, the dragon symbolizes the Emperor. At his side stands the magically powerful Phoenix with her life-giving song. The bride is the Phoenix and the groom is the Dragon on their day. Wear a Phoenix Crown (traditional headpiece for the bride), which is hard to find in the US. Integrate these symbols not only in your brocade but in just about every way imaginable. The phoenix is a flaming crested bird with a long tail. The Chinese dragon is a wingless male, though items with female (winged) dragons will work just as nicely.

8. Signature Cloth
The Chinese traditional guestbook isn't made of paper, but silk! Usually a medium-to- lightweight silk square, often embroidered around the edges and always red, guests sign their witness to this cloth with a black pen. The cloth is then carefully folded and stored as a special memento of the wedding. If you really want to be authentic: use a brush pen and ink. Most Chinese giftshops will carry these cloths ready to use for the wedding, often featuring dragon/phoenix motifs and/or double happiness.

9. Chinese Music
Why not include Chinese traditional instruments like the funky-sounding zither in your ceremony music? The effect will be stunning and unmistakably Chinese. If you choose CDs instead of live music, the soundtrack to "The Last Emperor" is thick with stunning performances featuring both the Er Hu and the Chang Di. Dancing is a large part of the reception, and Chinese pop is all the rave. In addition, a lot of American music has been translated to Chinese, including an impressive version of "My Heart Will Go On".

10. Firecrackers, Not Rice
Whoever came up with the idea of throwing rice on the bride and groom were not Chinese! Chinese show prosperity through the huge wedding feast - not rice, which is probably a Japanese tradition. Instead, Chinese use firecrackers to scare away evil spirits who may want to cause problems later. This ritual is performed not only at weddings, but most major celebrations. Before the couple crosses the threshold during the recessional, long chains of firecrackers suspended on a stick are lit for several minutes. Evening weddings feature noisy, full-scale firework displays as part of the festivities. Taking today's strict air pollution laws into consideration, most Chinese couples have to settle for a tape of fireworks or crashing cymbals to get the desired affect.

Symbols and Characters

There are a few Chinese symbols/characters which are commonly used in Chinese jewelry. Flowers represent prosperity, peaches represent long life and a boat means things are going smoothly for you in your career or during a journey. The flat, wide circle (shown above) is a powerful symbol of joining together, that when worn represents a person's infinite ability.
To express the following emotions, try sporting Chinese jewelry with these characters: ¸£(fu) an overall blessing; » (lu) prosperity; ÊÙ (shou) longevity °® (ai) love, ÈÌ (ren) patience, ϲ(xi) happiness, ‡Ö (xi) double happiness.

Jade Quality

Jade comes in many colours including white, red, yellow, green, lavender and black; within these colors there are different tones and grades. When searching for jade, there are a few things to look for: richness in color, evenness in color, clarity, size and workmanship. The richness and clarity range from transparent to opaque with the highest quality having a consistent clarity like honey. Textures range from fine to coarse and the highest quality will be clear and free of impurities. Stay away from jade that have crack lines from the front to the back. If the jade feels warm to the touch is it probably fake and made from remolded plastic or resin. Under a 10x lens, you can also see air bubbles and fold lines in fake jade. If you pay under YY1,000 for a piece of jade jewelry , it will not be high grade and was probably dyed or color enhanced to make the look or design more appealing.

Chinese Wedding Receptions

Chinese wedding banquets are known for their extravagance and splendor. Learn more about traditional foods and customs that accompany the wedding reception.

The reception is by far the most important part of the Chinese wedding day. The wedding banquet is a significant way for the groom's family to show off for family and friends by thowing a generous party.

1.Many times there are tables of mah jong (a Chinese tile game), set up for guests to play before the festivities begin.

2.There is usually an emcee to "host" the evening and alert the guests to important announcements.

3.Traditionally, banquet tables are round, and seating charts are manipulated so guests who do not know one another are seated together.

4.Since the wedding banquet holds such esteem in Chinese culture, the menu is usually made up of Chinese delicacies - the best that money can buy. These include lobster, abalone, roast suckling pig, dessert and fresh fruit.

5.Between courses, the emcee entertains the guests while the wedding party takes turns playing tricks on the couple (mostly on the groom). Like when the groom picked up the bride from her home that morning, the bridesmaids play funny games on the groom to make him show his love for the bride.

6.The opposite of Western tradition's receiving line, at the end of the banquet the bride and groom stand at the door, and speak to everyone as they leave.

7.Rather than gifts, guests usually give money tucked in red envelopes.

Chinese Wedding Ceremonies

More than saying "I Do", Chinese weddings involve going to parents' houses, playing jokes on the groom, and drinking lots of tea.

Chinese weddings are teeming with symbolic preparations quite different from Western wedding rituals. In emotion, though, they are exactly the same - beautiful, romantic, and funny. Here's how the Chinese tie the knot.

1.Once a couple decides they want to be married, both the bride and the groom go to their parents and ask for their permission/blessing.

2.The groom's family sets the date for the wedding, after consulting the Chinese Astrological Calendar for "good" days in which to wed.

3.The groom's family consults the astrological calendar again to find a "good" day in which to send gifts to the bride's family.

4.The groom then presents the bride's family with a monetary gift, even though today the groom's family will more likely pay for the wedding instead of give money. The bride will probably bring family jewelry to the groom's family for a gift.

5.Unlike American wedding customs, it is the responsibility of the groom's family to organize the Big Day; they usually decide the guest list, and then relay to the bride's family how many people they can invite.

6.The couple purchases a new bed for their wedding night and covers it with new linens that are, of course, red. If the couple already has a bed, they will purchase new red linens for their wedding night. A new bed and bedsheets symbolize a new beginning, and are also supposed to bring good luck to the couple.

7.Both the bride and the groom perform a hair-combing ceremony the night before the wedding, symbolizing the entrance into adulthood. The bride should perform the hair-combing under the gaze of the moon to bring her children. Both should comb their hair four times, each stroke bringing good luck. The first symbolizes the unity of the couple from the beginning of the marriage to the end, the second brings harmony and faithfulness into old age, the third brings lots of children and grandchildren, and the fourth stroke brings wealth and a long-lasting marriage.

8.On the day of the wedding, both families decorate their houses top to bottom in red. The bride wears a red wedding gown, although she may change her costume four or five times during the course of the day.

9.On the day of the wedding, the groom and the groomsmen go to the bride's house to pick her up. Before he can see his bride, the bridesmaids make him perform a series of silly tests to prove himself "worthy" of his bride. The tests can be anything that will force him to show his love, from physical feats to singing songs. The final test, though, is whether or not he brought "good luck" for the bridesmaids, usually contained in red envelopes full of money or small gifts for the girls. Then the wedding party moves on.

10.They stop at the bride's family's home first, where the bride and groom serve the parents tea and receive gifts. Again, monetary gifts are presented in red envelopes, and there is usually jewelry for the bride.

11.The couple then moves to the groom's family's home, where the same ritual is performed, ending again with gifts and money.

12.Leaving the house, the bride is not allowed to touch her feet to the ground until they reach the ceremony site, so she is carried from the door to the car. Opening a red umbrella over the bride at this time brings good luck to the bride's fertility.

13.The official ceremony is performed. Afterward, family and friends move on to the wedding banquet, which is considered the most important part of the wedding day.

Flavor your wedding decorations with Chinese red. Check out how to infuse your nuptials with this breathtaking contrast to our pure Western white.

Double Happiness
This Chinese symbol of two xi characters placed together represents ultimate joy and is used mainly for weddings. From Chinatowns or Chinese specialty stores you can get wedding decorations of all kinds emblazoned with this symbol, from cutouts and stationery to giant flags and red scarves. You can fly beautiful silk scarves at your reception, or print the Double Happiness character on your placecards.

Phoenix and Dragon Motif
Add the wingless dragon and shining Phoenix to your decor to represent groom and bride. If you don't wish to work these designs into your own bridal attire, add these characters to attendants' clothing (vests for groomsmen or flowing Cheongsams for bridesmaids), invitations, favors, or decorations for Chinese flair.

Chinese Guestbook
This Chinese witnessing tradition makes a beautiful addition to your ceremony's decor: instead of a traditional guestbook, purchase a large red square of lightweight silk and a brushpen and ink (cloths featuring dragon and phoenix motifs can be purchased at Chinese specialty stores). Have guests sign this cloth "guestbook" for a keepsake to last a lifetime.

All Things Red
Instead of chilly, innocent white, add decorations full of bold and joyful red. Tie red ribbons to pews and chairbacks. Create red centerpieces full of Chinese flowers such as peonies and lotus. Go for red table linens instead of white, or serve champagne in cherry-red flutes.

In Chinese culture, flowers are not only objects of beauty, but symbols of life, happiness, and fertility. If you want info on traditional Chinese wedding flowers and their meanings, look no further.

If you want to infuse your wedding ceremony with the Asian beauty of Chinese flowers, concentrate on:

The meaning of red in Chinese weddings is deep and powerful. Red is the symbol of ultimate joy in Chinese culture, and adding red roses or other red flowers will boost the Chinese decorative look popular in traditional weddings.
In contrast to the Western wedding, white flowers are the symbol of death and used only for funerals.
Many flowers used in Chinese culture are common here in the States and readily available.

Peony
A symbol of spring and renewed life, peonies come in many colors and varieties. They are easy to obtain and are beautiful additions to centerpieces, as well as pew and chair decorations.

Orchid
This luxuriant, long-petalled flower is exotic and fragrant, and is an excellent choice for bouquets as well as corsages for mothers. The orchid is the Chinese symbol of love and fertility, a perfect token for weddings.

Lotus
This flower represents four virtues in the Buddhist religion as well as being the cornerstone of Asian flower culture. Sutras say the closed inner petals and open ring of outer petals of the lotus blossom represent four virtues: scent, purity, softness, and lovliness. Delicate and spiritual, use this flower floating in glass bowls of water or as a shining addition to your bouquet.

Narcissus
Other common names of this joyful flower are daffodil and jonquil. These symbols of spring represent change and end of hibernation, and are perfect for spring weddings. Mix with other spring flowers for a beautiful springtime bouquet, or planted in pots or simple vases as centerpieces.

Chinese Wedding Culture

In Chinese legend, the fatherly God-in-the-moonlight ties a red string around the ankles of the man and woman who are supposed to be husband and wife someday. Thus, no matter how far apart they are, they will eventually get married...

Proposal & Betrothal

Two families pick an auspicious date as the Betrothal Day. This is a formal meeting between the parents of the perspective bride and groom. The groom's family presents various proposal gifts that represents fertility and prosperity in Chinese Culture, which is also known as "Grand Gift". Thus, the two are considered officially engaged.

Wedding Day Ceremony

On the day of the wedding, two families performs "hair dressing" ritual and "capping" ritual for the bride and groom respectively. Then the groom sets out to the bride's home, and he will inevitably be blocked at her door by her friends, and the bridesmaids will play door game with the groom and his attendants. The bride and groom will then leave her home and proceed to meet the groom's parents for Tea Ceremony. The wedding date ceremony ends with a feast which features elaborate Chinese wedding food.

Pre-Wedding Ritual

After the betrothal meeting, both families will make announcement to their relatives and friends by sending out "Double Happiness Cakes" along with invitations. The bride's family then prepares dowry and give a list of the dowries to the groom's family. The groom's family performs "setting bridal bed" ritual... The groom's family decorates the bridal house for the wedding, while the bride's family prepares household accessories, mostly bedding and dining necessities, for the new home.

Wedding Night Ritual

The night of the wedding, the bridal room will lit dragon and phoenix candle to drive away the evil spirit, the newlyweds will drink wine from two cups tied together with a red string, arms crossed from each other. This is the formal wedding vow in Chinese culture. Then the bride will be offered dumplings that's boiled half-raw. The pronunciation of "raw" is the same as giving birth to children, a indication of family prosperity.

Post-wedding Customs

The next morning of the wedding, the bride should get up early and make a meal for the groom's family to demonstrate that she is well-nurtured. Three days after the wedding, the groom and bride will go back to visit the bride's parents.